Just Telling Our Story

Hope for an eastside neighborhood

Yesterday, I sent a news release out for my client and former employer, the Indianapolis Parks Foundation. The release was a very positive announcement about another grant IPF received to help it revitalize a neglected park and neighborhood on the east side of Indianapolis, Windsor Village Park. But community reaction to the release startles me.

I was part of this fundraising campaign during my employment with IPF, before I left in late 2005. For me, it is an exciting project, because I think it will make obvious to many the impact a park can have on a community. Before ground broke for a new, 12,000-square-foot community center last December, this park was in seriously sad shape. The community building was tiny, dirty and not attractive - but it was an important centerpiece of this neighborhood. The community has its own issues, with a high level of crime, neglected and abandoned houses, and a dense population. But I was able to see firsthand how the residents there appreciated having a place to go and play cards, video games, table tennis or basketball, or have help with their homework after school. They didn't care that it was in disrepair (although, as anyone would, they would certainly have appreciated something in better shape). They need that park.

Now, they're about to be the lucky recipients of a giant, brand-new community center. There will be a computer lab, education space, fitness area, game room and indoor gym. Outside will be a new playground, basketball court, picnic shelter and walking areas. The IMPD is expected to have a more regular presence in the neighborhood, too.

I think this community is in for a shock. I think residents will be shocked by how good it feels to have a community center that is just for them - a place where they can go for free and take advantage of a lot of great amenities and park programming that hasn't been available to them before. It has been proven in qualitative research by various groups that parks, trees and walking trails reduce the pressures of living in economically challenged neighborhoods like Windsor Village. They foster a sense of community, increase the feeling of safety, decrease violent behavior and have a positive impact on local property values.

This community desperately needs to feel these positive benefits. And it excites me to think about it actually taking shape. When the community center is completed in November this year, I want to go back. I want to see the kids whom I met a couple of years ago and see what they think about their park now. I want to watch the change happen. I want to see the increased pride in the residents. I want to see the neighborhood improve.

The true impact of parks has always been sort of invisible to me. I haven't ever witnessed a park's transformation, nor watched a community transform with it. I have to say, it truly excites me. This is why I love being associated with not-for-profit organizations. They're doing fantastic things in the community. And I want to be a part - somehow, even if in a very small way.

But back to my original point. The release was sent out yesterday, and the Indianapolis Star picked it up for their e-newsletter, the PM Update. It was a very short piece (just a few paragraphs), but I was surprised by the reaction of the community to it. Here's the link to the article. Make sure you read the comments left by others.

People overwhelmingly were not supportive of the donation to the Parks Foundation for use in this neighborhood. People were saying the area should be bulldozed and that the money would be better used elsewhere. This saddens me, because I would have given our residents more credit in the care and concern department.

Why the negative thoughts? Why can't we be excited for this area and see that change is good? It's clear the area needs improving. Giving the residents a place to be proud of, a place to gain empowerment from and a place to be the hub for improved morale in the area can only be a positive thing, in my mind.

I liked what commenter CLP (and, in the interest of full disclosure, yes, I know who this is) says about place: "Place matters to residents, businesses and investors. Place is an economic and visual indicator of a community's vitality. Successful community-building cannot occur if there is an absence of a place that is meaningful to those who live there and respected by those outside its boundaries. ... The place that matters for the families of the Windsor Village Park neighborhood is Windsor Village Park."

I would challenge the other, more negative commenters to think positively. Be happy for this area. Improving this area can only improve people's lives and improve our city as a whole. That's ultimately what it's all about.

A new view of the mayor

I have to admit that I have not been overly impressed with recently inducted Indianapolis Mayor Greg Ballard's professional speaking skills. Overall, to be honest, I haven't been impressed with him much at all.

But today his campaign communications manager, Debra Taylor, spoke to the PRSA Hoosier Chapter members at our monthly luncheon, and I have to admit that she changed my mind. I still am not impressed with his speaking skills, but I can relate to the fact that it's just not one of his best qualities. We all have those parts of our jobs that we don't do as well as we'd like. Taylor helped me realize that this is just one of those things for him. (It's unfortunate that this is such an important part of his job, but according to Taylor, he's really working on this.)

Inside, according to Taylor, Mayor Ballard is simply a genuine, concerned resident of Indianapolis, trying to make things better for the city. Like a good public relations professional, she focused on his strengths during her presentation -- his genuine nature, his ability to listen and his true desire for improvements in the city. It gave me hope.

I hope that we all get a chance to see those positives on a more regular basis. I think former Mayor Bart Peterson was exceptional in the charm department. I was always impressed with him. I even had a chance to meet him a couple of times during my employment with the Indianapolis Parks Foundation, and I can tell you that he was as pleasant and genuine as they come.

Now, it's time to see that from Mayor Ballard. I'm hopeful for you, Mayor.

One step closer to full-time

Well, I finally did it. I called day care today to talk to them about adding Mondays to my work and the kids' day care schedules. I really thought it might be a while before they could work us into the schedule, but I was wrong. By some stroke of luck, both E's and G's rooms had an opening on Mondays. We start picking up that day March 3.

Even after debating for so long about whether or not to add a day to my schedule (and therefore take away a day I had with my kids at home) - and ultimately deciding that the extra day was the most practical decision - I am still torn.

On the one hand, I know I need the extra time to complete my work. I have been working around 40 hours a week as it is, and having two days at home with the kids, although nice on the surface, is actually more stressful on the work end than it is enjoyable on the family end. Plus, I am finding more and more often that my clients expect me to be available during the workweek, and I am often on tight deadlines for those days, meaning I must work while I have my kids at home anyway.

On the other hand, these are my babies! I can't get enough of them as it is, and now I'm giving up another day? Ugh. They grow so fast, and I love having time with them. It makes me very sad to have to sacrifice more time with them. (Plus, it's another $36 a week for day care to add one full-time child and one part-time child!)

In my ongoing mental battle while trying to make this decision, there were a few things that made me lean toward adding a day. Maybe reviewing them now would help me agree with myself that this is a good decision!

• I need the time in the evenings to relax and unwind. I have learned that when you don't take time for yourself - when you're not thinking about work or being stressed about deadlines - you wear yourself out, physically and emotionally. It's harder to be in a good mood for my family when I do have time with them, and the evenings run into early mornings as I try to squeeze in every possible hour.

• Mondays and Fridays are often not the "quality" time with my kids that I had hoped they would be. Again, they often include squeezing in work, but they also fill with sleeping an extra hour, getting all of us ready, runs to the bank, getting an early lunch, keeping the kids from killing each other, getting G to kindergarten, a couple of free hours with E while G's at school, picking up G, getting the kids snacks, putting them down for a nap and then working a couple of hours before my hubby gets home. They're not the quiet, peaceful, playful days I had hoped they would be. I am hopeful that if I make Monday a work day, then I can plan to get up at my regular time on Friday, so that our whole first half of the day isn't spent getting everyone ready. That should hopefully leave us some good, old-fashioned quality time with both kids in the morning and a couple of extra hours with my youngest.

• There is currently NO wiggle room in my schedule. I panic when our animals come down sick and need to go to the vet or when a kid is sick and can't go to school. I automatically lose a third of my workweek for that one. Making things worse, since I already work every extra minute of the day, evening and weekend, there's no possible way to make up an additional eight hours in the week, so I really put my deadlines and client work in jeopardy. That's not good for any of us! I also don't feel like I can comfortably add anything "extra" into my schedule - lunches with former coworkers or friends, visits to my kids' schools, etc. - which is one of the benefits I had hoped for when I started freelancing.

So, I suppose the extra work day is a good thing overall. I am happy that I have enough work to keep me busy during this time, and I am hopeful that gaining back some of my free time will help me feel better overall. I'll just have to really focus on making Fridays special for my kids.  I'll have to force myself not to work on those days and give my complete attention to my little ones.

Plus, we're still in a good balance overall -- four working days and three non-working days a week. I know that the majority of the working world is not that fortunate, and I am lucky to even have that option. For that I am extremely thankful.

Why I left BNI

It’s been more than a week now since I announced to my beloved group of BNI members (Avon Plus chapter) that I would be leaving them. And while I sincerely enjoyed “sleeping in” until 6 a.m. this past Thursday as a result, I am already missing them.

BNI is a team of professionals representing all kinds of businesses, both business-to-business and business-to-consumer. Members meet each week with the goal of getting to know each other well enough to feel comfortable making referrals to each other, thereby supporting each others’ businesses. It’s a chance for each member to expand his or her reach in glorious numbers, banking on the fact that every other member in the group knows dozens of people, and hopefully he or she is willing to encourage their contacts to use the services other members offer.

It’s a wonderful concept, and it was a significant boost to my freelancing career for my first year out on my own.

But, for several reasons, I decided to leave the group, and I wanted to share my thought process behind that decision, for anyone who cares!

• REASON #1: THE BASKET. I was fortunate to have a somewhat steady stream of new business flowing due to other members’ referrals. However, fulfilling my end of the deal was not easy for me, and it was somewhat unfair for other members for me to be taking and not giving as much as I would have liked. I had every intention of making referrals…I wanted to give as well as gain. (The BNI motto is "givers gain.") But I found that referring people to the kinds of services one uses more on a personal level (plumber, realtor, water services, title insurance, mortgage lender, general contractor, etc.) was difficult for me. My network of people I interact with regularly are more business-related. I don’t talk to my clients about their plumbing needs, and so I was really forced to rely on friends and family members to make my referrals. In that regard, it was sort of slim pickin’s. Each week, we are to “put something in the basket” as it travels around the room – whether that be a one-to-one request, a referral or a thank-you for business. It was difficult (even stressful at times) to be sure that I had something to put in every single week. It was required, and I wasn’t comfortable forcing myself to put in referrals for friends or family who might not be comfortable with me referring them to my fellow members. This is one thing I wish BNI would reconsider, requiring something in the basket each week. It's a big part of why I left. I know I would not have been able to fulfill that requirement for another 52 weeks.

• REASON #2: FAMILY. This, in all actuality, is actually Reason #1 in my book (but I wanted to put a BNI-related reason first in this list, so people would be sure to read it!). I started freelancing with the ultimate goal of being able to spend more time with my family. Unfortunately (and fortunately) I have had more business than I can handle in what I had hoped would be a 24-hour schedule. So, I needed to slim down by eliminating “extra” and non-billable hours. BNI was a pretty significant time commitment for me – with meetings, one-to-ones, power team meetings and volunteer projects - and the non-billable hours racked up quickly.
  

• REASON #3: BUSINESS PRIORITIES. From a strategic business-building standpoint, I need to be focusing on communications directors and related professionals in larger churches, not-for-profit agencies, health care organizations and possibly some larger companies. These are my “prime” clients. They need help for a variety of projects on a regular basis. They need more than business cards. And they are more likely to turn into long-term, regular clients than the kinds of businesses I was connecting with through BNI. Don’t get me wrong: I have loved creating business cards and brochures for the companies I have been fortunate enough to work with through my BNI referrals, and I sincerely hope I continue to get some of those kinds of assignments. I love working with small businesses, because I know where they’re coming from and want to help them communicate well. But from a simply strategic standpoint, in reality, my time is more efficiently spent reaching out to companies that would be more likely to turn into “regular” clients. My networking time might be better spent with PRSA, which brings me to my next reason.

• REASON #4: PRSA. PRSA (Public Relations Society of America) is a primary way for me to connect with other communicators in town, build my network of potential clients and also stay connected with my profession in terms of professional development. I just rejoined the Hoosier chapter, and I am excited about getting involved. My first meeting is coming up next week! It also only meets once a month, rather than weekly like BNI, so the time commitment will hopefully not break the bank for me.

Are you still with me?

All of that being said, I do encourage other people to join BNI. Here are just a few of the reasons.

• INCREASING YOUR NETWORK. I have met a lot of wonderful people in Hendricks County whom I might never have met otherwise. Each of them has connections to other people I might never meet on my own, but I might have the chance to meet someday as a result of this group.

• FRIENDSHIP. I work alone, and I have no staff. This is a potentially lonely combination, especially for someone like me who likes to socialize a little! This group was essentially my “staff” – professional adults I saw on a regular basis and whom I got to know well enough to chit-chat about families and other casual topics.

• LEARNING TO NETWORK. Being part of this group taught me how to make small talk with people I don’t know well, prepare a 30-second and 60-second sales pitch about myself and my business, and how important and powerful networking can be. These have been very valuable lessons for me!

• LAUGHTER. I laughed every single week with that group. There were just some hilarious individuals and other people whose lightheartedness was very welcome early on Thursday mornings. I’ll miss the laughter the most.

So there you have it. I know I’ve taken much more of your time than you had hoped, but if you read it all the way through, I thank you.

And I thank you, BNI Avon Plus, for all of the laughs, the memories and the business. I hope you’ll keep me on the sub list, and I hope to see you soon. Take care.

(Want to know more about BNI? Check out this Web site: www.bni-indiana.com)

I hear ya, buddy.

Yesterday afternoon, my son stopped me in my tracks.

He had brought home a small booklet of drawings he made at school - a very short story about building a snowman that he wrote and illustrated. The top page caught my eye, and I asked him to tell me the story.

He read me the sentence at the top of the page: "I build a snowman, me and my dad and me."

Ah, how sweet!

And the snowman was quite creative, even including a hat and buttons!

Then I asked him to explain the picture.

Starting at the right, he said, "That's the snowman, and that's Daddy, and that's me," and now the kicker ... "and that's you."

Yep, that's me. Sitting in my chair watching my family have a good old time building a snowman.

My chair. That's where I sit to work at home, out in the open in what used to be our dining room (now my open-air office).

He went on to tell me that he drew it small because if he drew it as big as it really is, it would be bigger than the paper. Yes, it is a big chair.

I was nowhere to be found in the rest of the book.

It didn't take me long to realize what he was saying. Yes, Mommy, you're sitting in your chair, working like always, while Daddy and I have fun.

It broke my heart.

I hear ya, Buddy. Loud and clear. 

Time for pancakes!

Ah, I'm about to enjoy one of my favorite meals of the year...the St. Augustine Pancake Supper. As you may or may not know, Lent begins tomorrow, so in good Episcopal tradition, we have to pig out on pancakes and sausage before we are supposed to fast for 40 days (plus Sundays). It's all for a good cause, since this is one of the biggest fund-raisers of the year for our little church. I am always amazed at how many people come each year.

I have to admit that I have never been good at giving something up for Lent. I have had good intentions in the past, but for some reason, I just can't seem to stick with it. Maybe I'll be able to do it this year. But what do I give up? Hershey Kisses (I have about 5 to 10 a day)? Dr. Pepper? Wow, this is a serious sacrifice we're talking about. I'm not sure... (God, give me strength!)

Whether you're the seriously religious type or not, it seems like many people at least talk about "giving something up" for Lent. (Kind of like a mid-February New Year's resolution.) Have you decided to give something up, either this year or in the past? If so, please share what it was and how it went! (And while I love personal e-mails, it would make my day if you responded by clicking on the Comments link right below this message!)